Indian Weddings and Traditions

Today, I was asked by a friend of mine to write about the blindly followed traditions in our Indian society, especially in weddings. When I gave it a thought, I realised that this needs to be put out there for people to read and understand that the things we do in the name of traditions are corrupting our souls.

Everybody is aware about the term big-fat Indian weddings. We love to dress up, hold different ceremonies for the bride and the groom and enjoy ourselves to the fullest. But we forget, there are people who unethically benefit here. We have always ignored the bizzare and problematic traditions being followed in our families because apparently, it's a part of our culture. But do we realise what harm it does to other people and ourselves as well.

Let's talk about the most commonly practiced tradition in Indian weddings and that is Kanyadaan. This means, in literal words, the donation of a maiden. Now, the very first thing that came to my mind when I was mature enough to understand this practice was 'WHY'. I was, very subtly, shaken up. The society doesn't step back from objectifying not just women but men too and we celebrate the "donation" of a woman to another man, rather follow it blindly in the name of traditions.

Whenever I wonder about women and people around not taking a stand against these practices, I get reminded of the fact that we have been raised in the same society. Apparently, women believe that it is okay for us to be reduced as a man's property. Patriarchy is deeply engraved within our minds too. We do not want to bring a change because change seems scary. We would rather accept it as it does no harm to us. These are some advices I have been given by the elder women in my family. I just want it let them know, we lose out individuality, our freedom, our right as a human. We aren't even considered human beings, it's always somebody's daughter or wife or sister or mother or what not.

I just want people to know that we need to stop all the problematic practices and let the upcoming generation see a world where every gender is equal and weddings and traditions do not hold power to degrade anybody.

By Jiya Gahlot